Pleasing the world to please myself

You know those points in time where you don't feel like yourself, that's what i've been experiencing lately. I don't feel like myself. When i hangout with friends it's almost as if i put a front on, like i become a different person, and i lose all self-control. I say things without thinking, things that make me feel annoying or unwanted. After hanging out i'll fixate on the things i said that day. I base whether or not i had a good day on how i feel towards the things i said that day. Did i say the right thing? Did i say the wrong thing? No one has ever made me feel like i have to act or say certain things to please them or to make myself tolerable, so why do i feel like i need to do those things? Why do i feel the need to please other people in order to please myself? How come i feel so repulsed by myself after having a simple conversation with someone?